Day 28: I'm old from a certain point of view

January 23, 2010

Still watching massive amounts of Tennis right now, kind of why I have not written anything in a day or so. It is sort of strange watching Tennis as a twenty nine year old though, because according to Tennis rules, I am almost at the end of the line. Most players either retire or only play select tournaments when they get to be thirty years old, so if I were playing Tennis, I would be nearing the end of my career. This is so strange because when I first starting watching and playing, I think I was around the age of fourteen. When I would watch back then, everyone seemed so much older than me. Most importantly though, the idea of people retiring at the age of thirty seemed totally logical to me. It just seemed like thirty was pretty old and an ideal age to move on. I can still understand why I thought this way, as you never think you are going to be thirty one day when you are a teenager.

Now that I am almost thirty years old myself though, the thought of being too old to do something seems completely absurd. If I were to finally get back into proper physical shape again(and it wouldn't really take that long), I know I could be just as good(if not better) then I was back then. Well, I was never very good to begin with and to be fair I was far better at age 25 then I ever was as a teenager. It is just the idea that I am to old at 29 to do something already. I'm sure this comes with the fact that I still feel like I am 19 years old anyways, something I have to constantly remind myself of. It's just that I refuse to believe that there is something that I am already to old to do.

I know part of reason I feel this way is because I have basically accomplished nothing that I had planned on doing when I was in high school. With that being said though, I am confident that I can do anything that my 18-year old self wanted to do. I wish there was some way to put this to the test, like a self olympics. I know I could put that punk ass kid in his place. Really though, I just hate the idea that I am not as capable as I was in the past. This is probably a common thought that people have as they get older and I suppose I am no different. Stuff like this bugs me because I don't want to be one of those people who dreads getting older. As long as you have the right attitude, your age should not matter to you at all. I still have some time before I turn thirty, so I will have to work on this one.